Well we all know that sometimes ignorance is bliss. But other times, knowledge is power. Blah blah! Cliché much!
What I’m trying to say is that there are times when, as a member of this wild and wacky world, you just need to know how to work the system- instead of having it ‘work’ you.
I’ve compiled this handy list of how to detect when people are having a go at you, or trying to pull the wool over your eyes. This guide will help you to identify those times when people are pulling a fast one on you, so that you are better equipped at dodging bullets and the like.
The reverse also applies- if you need to pull a fast one on someone else, read through this handy guide as a starting point. I hope it will serve you well, and that soon enough you will be a master manipulator!
A word of warning- the bliss ends here. After gaining this knowledge, you may be surprised to learn who is taking you for a ride!
Detectin’
The following techniques for picking up if someone is lying are often used by police and security experts. This knowledge is also useful for managers, employers, and for anyone to use in everyday situations where telling the truth from a lie can help prevent you from being a victim of fraud, scams and other deceptions.
Signs of Deception
Do you speak body Language?
In order to tell if a person is lying, you need only to read their physical expressions. The body is a dead giveaway- it never lies.
When a person is lying, their physical expressions will be limited and stiff, with few arm and hand movements. Hand, arm and leg movement will be confined to a closer personal space.
A person who is lying to you will also avoid making eye contact.
When lying, the liar will use his or her hands by touching the face, throat and mouth. They may also touch or scratch the nose or behind their ear. A liar will not touch the chest or heart area with an open hand.
Emotional Gestures & Contradiction
To identify if a person is lying, pay attention to the timing and duration of emotional gestures- you will notice (if you know the person well enough) that these are off their normal pace. The display of emotion is delayed, stays longer than it would naturally, and then stops suddenly. There is a lack of fluidity in the liar’s emotional responses.
You will also be able to observe that the timing between emotions, gestures and expressions and words is uneven.
Also, expressions and verbal statements will be contradictory, such as frowning when saying “I love you.”
When someone is faking their emotions, their expressions are limited to mouth movements instead of the whole face. For example; when someone smiles naturally their whole face is involved: jaw/cheek movement, eyes and forehead push down, whereas when they are lying, only the mouth will move.
Interactions and Reactions
A guilty person gets defensive. An innocent person will often go on the offensive.
A liar is uncomfortable facing his questioner/accuser and may turn his head or body away.
A liar might unconsciously place objects (book, coffee cup, etc.) between themselves and the person they are lying to.
Verbal Context and Content
A liar will use the same words you have used in your question for their answer. When asked, “Did you eat the last cookie?” The liar answers, “No, I did not eat the last cookie.”
Liars sometimes avoid “lying” by not making direct statements. They imply answers instead of denying something directly. They think this will get them off the hook, but if you’re sharp enough, this will give it away pretty quickly.
The guilty person may speak more than natural, adding unnecessary details to convince you. You will notice that they are not comfortable with silence or pauses in the conversation. They may become more flamboyant with their words, and actually land up digging the hole that much deeper without even realizing it.
Note how the stress of lying affects them.
A liar may leave out pronouns and speak in a monotonous tone. When a truthful statement is made the pronoun is emphasized as much or more than the rest of the words in a statement.
Words may be garbled and spoken softly, and syntax and grammar may be off. In other words, the liar will muddle sentences.
Other signs of a lie
A simple way to test for lying, is to measure a persons desire to avoid a subject, which will sometimes indicate dishonesty or guilt. If you think the person is lying, change the subject quickly. A lying person will often go along easily, and may even visibly relax. An innocent person is more likely to be slightly confused by the change and want to finish their thoughts.
The guilty incumbent may also try to use humour or sarcasm to avoid a subject.
Obviously, just because someone exhibits one or more of these signs does not make them a liar. The above behaviors should be compared to a person’s normal behaviour whenever possible.
Most lie detecting experts agree that a combination of body language and other cues must be used to make an educated guess on whether someone is telling the truth or a lie.
For most of us, though, it’s not magicians or criminal masterminds we need to worry about when it comes to detecting deceivers. In fact, we should be most on guard against ourselves. “Often we don’t want to know when somebody is lying,” explains University of Massachusetts psychology professor Robert Feldman. In short, we are programmed to believe compliments and avoid painful truths, both of which make a liar’s task much easier.
Good luck Springleapers!
Go bust them trash talkers!